March 2012
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104.
Jesus fucking Christ, whenever I speak people either don’t hear me or completely misunderstand what I say. This can’t be all my fault.
February 2012
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103.
My mom just accused me of not using each of my lotion bottles equally.
Now, this is a serious accusation. Lotions are well known for their strong belief in fair treatment, and if I don’t start using the exact same amount of lotion in each bottle, I may have a violent liberal lotion uprising on my hands. Heavens forbid I don’t respect the rights of each individual lotion I own.
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102.
My friends when I talk about Batman:
My friends when I talk about Hemingway:
My friends when I talk about anything else I like:
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101.
In fourth period today, I fell asleep for like, three minutes, and I had a vision/dream.
There was this dark-skinned, white robed woman, standing on a spaceship in outer space (apparently, she can breathe in space) and she had on a pair of garishly bright purple and pink bacon strip earrings.
We’re standing out there in front of a spiral galaxy, observing the view from a shiny chrome...
afternoonsnoozebutton:
xvxavier:
If you’re a “nice guy” to a girl up until you realize she doesn’t want to date you, then go on about how she’s a cold shrew that friendzoned you and how no girls date nice guys, like, nah mate, girls do date nice guys. You just aren’t a nice guy. You’re a passive aggressive beta with internalized misogyny and a serious victim complex.
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“No.”
– Actress Julianne Moore, when asked if she gained a newfound respect for Sarah Palin after delving deeper into Palin’s life to portray her in the upcoming film “Game Change.” (via mamaatheist)
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current favorite things:
- max landis’s rant on the death and return of superman
- max landis’s “chronicle”
- max landis
- max landis
- max landis’s drunk comic book history video
- max landis
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ghirahim:
i love felidae because you look at it and the opening and you’re like aww look at these cute kitties
look at that silly face lmao!!! kawaii pie :***
and then you’re like “oh no a kitty drama mystery!!!” and you think it’s going to be like the great mouse detective, right, g rated and adorable and quirky and shit
wrong
wrong
wrong
wrong wrongwrong wrong wronngggggGGGgg
i...
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